The Turn of the Screw, The Aspern Papers and Two Stories (Barnes & Noble Classics Series) - Henry James, David L. Sweet
This is more of a rant than a "real" review. I hate "The Turn of the Screw."

I got to read "The Turn of the Screw" in my Literary Interpretation class, which was great for two reasons - one, I already had a copy of it in my library, and two, it would give me a reason to read the damn thing. Understand - I was damn excited.

Looking back, I would now say that I HAD to read "The Turn of the Screw". Shit, was this book like some kind of post-modern art, where clarity and character and enjoyability are put aside - but, shit, isn't the CONCEPT the most beautiful thing you've ever seen?

EVERYTHING that happens in the story is debatable - which sounds awesome, but when you think about why story needs some solid cement to keep shit attached to something, then you realize what you are in for is the literary equivalent of looking at some art you dislike, with the artist himself standing next to you, trapping you into a conversation about how clever he was for turning a bunch of splatters and rectangles into some homogenous mass. Imagine that for more pages than you can handle it, with an ending that makes you just relieved to see the end of it, no matter how senseless and joyless it is.

I was really disappointed here; everybody sucks this novella's dick, I guess because it's the right thing to do - it's what everybody who loves the genre does, so you do it, too. You nod and agree, throwing in your two cents about what it all REALLY meant, and your friends murmur how intelligent your point of view is. You hipster shit - and then you jump all over laughing at some poor person who dares to mention Clive Barker or Stephen King. "They're not "writers," they write for MONEY. They write about monsters and hillbillies and phallic symbols."

Fuck you, I guess I thought that I was suppose to ENJOY reading the damn paper things, but I should leave that up to the interpretation of some guy who has a library full of books who doesn't ever read anything newer that doesn't require a translation into a living language.

You want to know what I asked my literary interpretation teacher, after she had us read this mess? I asked her if she had ever read [b:House of Leaves|24800|House of Leaves|Mark Z. Danielewski|http://d.gr-assets.com/books/1327889035s/24800.jpg|856555], and she looked at me fucking blankly. I was being told how to dissect some great work of horror by somebody who is so out of the goddamn loop of the genre that she had never even heard of the book. And, yes, she rolled her eyes when Stephen King was being brought up - "Oh yes, and the great CONTEMPORARY author, Stephen King," sophisticated chuckle, "who, I'm SURE, has some scholars out there who study his work and write papers about him."

This story is for people who hate reading modern literature, hate reading anything complex and enjoyable - god fucking forbid your tastes veer outside of what your precious contemporaries would like to see in your book case.

Well, I got a unique perspective on the story (I had to have A point of view, because I got trapped with this book in a class that had me dissect the turd), and if you want to hear it, it's this - bitch be crazy and she poisoned the little shits, the end.

Ooh, amazing, right? I can't express how pissed I was at the let down this story laid on me. What, this story is special, because it was first? It has a historical significance, but I gotta be real here - I've read this trope before and it's since been done better. The "twist" is one long, drawn out trope that consists of the story in its entirety, and, you know, if you think that's a worthwhile read, don't let me ruin your enjoyment of this story.

Personally, I hate it when a thin veneer of a story is wrapped around some trope I've seen in prettier clothes and with a better personality. From a historical standpoint, the story has meaning and an importance, but fuck would I have rather studied an intelligent spiritual descendant of this trope and not the dry source of it.

I'm just glad to be done with it, and I would have to say that the story is about two-fifths of a bucket of fishheads, in terms of enjoyability.

Haven't had to read the other stuff int he collection, I am selling it to the near by book store, and maybe I can trade it in for some more Hunter S. Thompson or, shit, in memory of my Lit teacher, I can grab [b:11/22/63|10644930|11/22/63|Stephen King|http://d.gr-assets.com/books/1327876792s/10644930.jpg|15553789]. A nice fuck-you to the person who saddled me with this late-term abortion of a story.